Sometimes I just need a girls night out

If there ever was a time I needed to go have a beer with a good friend last night was it-and I didn't even know it. My best friend Tiffany called me to go have drinks at our local "Cheers" not far from where we live. We call it that because its the one place we always go, and the people know us there now. She texted about needing someone to talk to, and naturally I had to go. Its what good friends do. I am glad I did.

At first, I thought it was going to be a quick night. But we ended up chatting over a pitcher, musing over her new crush, and joking about my swinger neighbors. As conversations mixed with drinks tend to go, we soon got on the topic of sex. Then I say it.

"What if he is into girl on girl stuff? I can't even say I wouldn't do it again."

I saw her face. It was almost quizzical, like she couldn't figure out the answer to a really hard math problem. But then she did something amazing. She smiled. And kind of, agreed.

"Yeah, I'm not saying I wouldn't do it, like ever or anything. I just don't think I could get into a girl like that. That's all. And I couldn't know her. That shit would make it weird."

Okay, so she ignored the whole "again" bit. That's good. I wasn't ready for that yet. Even though Tiff is one of my best, closest and oldest friends, she never really knew about me dabbling into the other side before, or that I didn't quite give it up. We need a much longer girls night for that talk.

We went on to discuss how she feels that being with a girl is mostly foreplay, and how she kind of understands how it works out if you love someone but not if you just need a "fix" if it were, and I couldn't help but keep her talking. On our walk home, we were giddily discussing sex versus porn sex when it comes to what we would be willing to try. How we have been friends that long and never had this conversation I will never know. Maybe my little diary thing is making me just comfortable enough that I can open up with those that really do deserve to know me heart, mind, and soul.

Thanks, Tiff, for making me just that much less crazy. While it doesn't make her "yuri" or me any less so, it was oddly liberating to know that she didn't think sex, with a woman, but with no regard for a future is inherently evil. And though are views on why are different, the end is only a few beats from where I stand. So, I'm kinda not alone, right? Maybe one day, I will even be able to point to this, smile and say, "Hey, thats us...and this is me."