This is crazy. Sometimes I wonder how the hell I have survived this long. Movies, TV, and the media, they all tend to glamorize the "double life" mentality. In any form, it is believed that if you have some secret hidden life that no one in your daily grind knows about, you are somehow cooler or superior until in some characteristically Hollywood fashion, you are taken down by your own demons or bad guys or, in family movies, a dog or a pigeon or some other retarded thing.
Wouldn't even be that bad if that was the only thing wrong in my life. Or if I were famous, or rich, or a doll baby of the public in some other way. Fact is, the rest of us have to deal with our daily bullshit as normal people are wont to do. In horribly dysfunctional, often increasingly problematic, and never helpful ways that lead to miserable breakdowns and alcohol dependency. Sure, some celebs go down the same path, but at least people recognize them when they walk down the street and throw money at them for no good reason. I don't have that luxury. Combine the craziness of a sexually-enigmatic-meets-self-loathing personality with problems at work, a confusing past, shaky future, and a new found addiction to twitter and you have the mess that is Sy.
Maybe I should be happy. Or maybe I should take five Zanex and rock it comatose for a few days. Perhaps then I won't spread the insanity. Shit seems catchier than the swine flu right about now. It does help to know that I am not alone though. Those of us who are bat-shit insane, unite! It is time to take over the world...
Wouldn't even be that bad if that was the only thing wrong in my life. Or if I were famous, or rich, or a doll baby of the public in some other way. Fact is, the rest of us have to deal with our daily bullshit as normal people are wont to do. In horribly dysfunctional, often increasingly problematic, and never helpful ways that lead to miserable breakdowns and alcohol dependency. Sure, some celebs go down the same path, but at least people recognize them when they walk down the street and throw money at them for no good reason. I don't have that luxury. Combine the craziness of a sexually-enigmatic-meets-self-loathing personality with problems at work, a confusing past, shaky future, and a new found addiction to twitter and you have the mess that is Sy.
Maybe I should be happy. Or maybe I should take five Zanex and rock it comatose for a few days. Perhaps then I won't spread the insanity. Shit seems catchier than the swine flu right about now. It does help to know that I am not alone though. Those of us who are bat-shit insane, unite! It is time to take over the world...
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